© 2013 by BKO Counseling Services                    AFFORDABLE SAN DIEGO THERAPIST - Brian K. Oltman Psy.D., LMFT

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Relationship Problems

People come in all shapes and sizes and so do relationships. Conflicts can occur between spouses, coworkers, siblings, friends, families, neighbors, grandparents, bosses, and many others. It is often difficult to tell whether the particular conflicts in your life are "normal" or if you have "relationship problems". The best way to determine this is if you have:

  • Constant or frequent conflict with others

  • Long periods of non-communication with important people in your life due to conflicts

  • Difficulty resolving conflicts with others

  • Chronic or frequent feelings of anger or resentment towards others

  • Chronic feelings of loneliness or rejection from others

  • The perception that you are regularly criticized, demeaned, or dismissed by others

It is very difficult to get along with others consistently. Some disagreements are normal.  People tend to believe they're supposed to have the problems they're having, that their problems are "normal". Because of this belief, many people think that an actual relationship problem exists only when there are severe or chronic arguments or significant isolation. That's one reason why many people stay in abusive or loveless marriages.

Sometimes people believe that outside or external factors are to blame for the problems they have. What they fail to see is that the common denominator in all of their conflicts is themselves, and they usually fail to recognize how their reactions contribute to or even create the problem.

Often, we tend to be remarkably unaware of our own feelings and how those feelings get communicated to others. We often believe we are communicating one thing, while in the eyes of others we're communicating something very different.  

If you recognize any of these factors to be true in your relationships, it is time to make some changes.  

 

Contact me today to set up your appointment!

 

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